Tinyman 2004  

Since entering the campaign, Tinyman had called the Superhero central office and asked them to hold his calls. The campaign would keep him too busy, he explained, to attend to diabolic criminals or large natural disasters, accidents, or terrorist acts.

But one day Tinyman got a call on his cellular beeper, indicating the coordinates of a burning airplane above the Pacific he needed to save. Tinyman sprang into action, and immediately composed a speech. Then a cotton ball smeared with makeup base fell behind the dresser.

Tinyman got on the red phone after pouring himself a tall whiskey and skim milk.

"Listen. I'm, uh, sick, and can't, uh, save the burning airplane."

"You'll lose your benefits."

"How about The Blue Avocado. I would like to recommend her for the job, the burning airplane job. She's a good, a real good, flyer."

"She's all tied up with a deadly meteor shower."

"Yeah. Well, how about Dr. Brain?"

"He's a badguy. He won't do burning airplane work for us."

"Right, right. Well, uh, let's see. What time is it? Has the thing crashed yet, I mean we've been on the phone-"

"It's still hanging at about 12,000 feet over Japan. I give it a little over four minutes."

"Yeah? Hey, can you hold, I got a call on the other line. It might be my campaign manager Clench."

"Hey-"

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SB