20 July 1999
Newspoetry Horoscopes
ARIES March 20-April l8
This is not a good time for formal experimentation. Until September,
your free verse is true and unerring. Don't revise. You need buy the
newspaper only on Sunday, your instinct for politics being as keen as
your instinct for language.
TAURUS April 19-May 19
Until the Winter Solstice, you will find your creativity inexplicably
stifled by all Microsoft products. You will have success if you download
the trial version of Macromedia Freehand. Don't believe anything in
the Tribune. It is all bullshit. But your unwavering pen may compose
a new truth.
GEMINI May 20-June 19
You haven't fully explored the possibilities of multisequentiality,
and you should try to interlink everything you write until July 29,
when Mars leaves the building. You will find that you have better dreams.
By this time next week you'll have reached a decision regarding a stanza
you can't quite get right. Act on it.
CANCER June 20-July 21
Buy a really nice notebook and write in it everyday. Fuck newspoetry.
These are your private thoughts. Share them with nobody.
LEO July 22-August 21
This is not a good time for you technically. On July 24, your computer
will suffer a fatal crash and you will have to reinstall all your software.
Back things up now. Saturn, planet of limitation, is currently transiting
the area of your solar chart that governs your writing style - which
means you must take your time and get things right.
VIRGO August 22-September 2l
The sun and moon are powerful images. Now is the time to transform
any newspoem into a masterpiece.
LIBRA September 22-October 2l
Don't finish any newspoems too quick. If something is not working out
the way you intended, drop it and move on to something else. The breakthrough
may not come until after the tenth draft so be patient. You might instead
use this month as an opportunity to sharpen your photography, and use
Adobe Photoshop to make some images web-ready.
SCORPIO October 22-November 21
You've always been creative. Now people are beginning to take note.
As Jupiter enters Venus, now is a good time for formal gymnastics. There
is no constraint too arduous for you until August 23. Try to write a
20-consonant poem that alternates vowels and consonants. Then translate
it into French with the same constraints. Mars, currently hanging in
your sign, is a potent force indeed.
SAGITTARIUS November 22-December 20
Now that Mercury is moving retrograde, can you trust everything the
Nation tells you? Your soapbox is becoming wobbly. War is hell, but
everybody already knows that. Look for topics that require a degree
of subtlety. Try to give the pentagon the benefit of the doubt for five
weeks.
CAPRICORN December 21-January 19
Experiment with scanning in flowers and weeds and natural objects.
That nagging feeling that computers may bring the end of everything
good may be rooted in truth. But being a luddite may end up being more
hardship than you can take.
AQUARIUS January 20-February 18
You are in danger of becoming decentered and nonlinear. Avoid framesets.
Strive for closure, and try to write about news stories that take place
on a local scale. You're in for a stretch of honest work. You may have
to write something unpalatable today, but it is better that you do it
sooner rather than later.
PISCES February l9-March l9
You will find unfamiliar software easy and pleasurable to use for three
weeks. It is a good time for animation, or to try mixing sounds. You
will have to come back to reality eventually, but for now you should
lose yourself in daydreams and fantasies, and not worry too much about
what is happening in the world around you.
After all, some say the news is a fantasy, too.
