Today the entire social security fund is being taken in a fleet of
armored trucks to Atlantic City, where Clinton and Greenspan and a team
of economists plan to invest it wisely in a few low-risk card games
to ensure a sufficient retirement income for the kids of America
Today Bill Gates announced that he is resigning from Microsoft and
is joining the Chicago Cubs
Today the planet formerly known as the planet Pluto left the solar
system in disgust: across America, people who have been marginalized
due to their eccentric orbits rejoiced
Today Clinton cut the military, and has started programs to help soldiers
move from war to work
There are no more teachers
The Moscow Symphony Orchestra refused to tune their instruments today
Y2K is Black History Millennium
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